Word of the Week

Frustration

Definition: a feeling of dissatisfaction, often accompanied by anxiety or depression, resulting from unfulfilled needs or unresolved problems

Consider this...

Our days can sometimes be full of frustrations and disappointments.

Even if you are a positive and cheerful person, I am sure you have had days before when you could not believe how nothing was going according to your plans and wishes. However, when something major happens in my life (a friend gives birth, my siblings get married, I find out someone may be sick, etc.) I realize that the daily annoyances are simply not worth the frustration.

Imagine this: you are sitting in terrible traffic, in a hurry, of course. The bank closes two minutes before you get there. Your child decided to climb over the sofa after a particularly enthusiastic finger-painting session. Your car breaks down. You burn dinner. Your boss scolds you. Your rent gets raised. Someone is rude to you . . . and so on.

Each one of these things may be terribly upsetting at the time, but if you take a step back and remind yourself of the magnitude of the situation, you can shake it off without letting it ruin your day. Sure, the aggregate is quite frustrating, but the days when all of these things hit at once are few and far between.

For those of us who naturally get frustrated, recognizing and curbing the frustration may take some practice. You can start by reminding yourself after you get frustrated that no one you love got physically hurt because of the upsetting incident. You can also start laughing aloud - so what if you have to eat Mac’n’Cheese tonight instead of the steak dinner you tried to prepare? Save your energy to worry and celebrate the truly meaningful and important things in your life.

I will always be thankful that my father raised me this way. Whenever I broke a glass as a kid, he didn’t yell at me: he just asked me if I was ok, quickly picked me up from amongst the shattered pieces and then told me not to worry, life goes on. He would smile reassuringly and quickly clean up the glass as if nothing had happened. I find that even today, his attitude helps me. When something happens that initially upsets me, I try to remind myself that either something good has to come out of the situation or that I must find a way to find something positive in the seeming misfortune.

When you are stuck in traffic, call a family member or old friend. When your furniture gets messed up, get something new and fun or get creative with your family if the budget is tight. I challenge you to note this week that despite the frustrating incident, you can find or create something positive from it.