A couple of years ago I bought a book called The Little Black Book of Style by Nina Garcia. She’s Marie Claire’s magazine director and a judge on the TV program Project Runway.

She doesn’t come from a place that is usually size friendly and other than reading the book, I don’t know much about her, but sometimes we can find great thoughts in places we wouldn’t expect.

That’s the case with the Little Black Book of Style.

What won me over and made me decide to buy it was the content of the first chapter that I read while standing at the bookstore.

The name of this introductory chapter was “Be Your Own Muse.” Considering that fashion books are usually about rules of what to wear (or not) it was a refreshing surprise to find a book that actually believes that you are your own fashion designer. Of course she has some tips to share, but they are different from “straight jacket” rules.

So, I’ve decided to share some bits of this book over the course fo the next few weeks: aside from this first chapter that expresses her philosophy, chapter two is very practical and that’s the one that I’ll focus on. It contais a lot of great tips and ideas to make the act of getting dressed much easier and something that is fun to do.

Be your own muse

I’ve selected some very inspiring excerpts from the first chapter to give us a little food for thought.

“Confidence is captivating, it is powerful, and it does not fade — and that is endlessly more interesting than beauty.

The first and most important step to developing style is to project this kind of confidence - the kind of confidence that tells others that you respect yourself, love yourself, and dress up for yourself and nobody else.

You are your own muse.

Style comes from knowing who you are and who you want to be in the world; it does not come from wanting to be somebody else, or wanting to be thinner, shorter, taller, prettier. Many of the most stylish women in the world have not been great beauties, but they have all drawn from an enormous amount of self-confidence.

They made us think they were beautiful simply by believing it themselves. They did not let anyone else define them; they defined themselves.

I truly admire women who love themselves, even if they are not the standard beauty norm. I am fascinated by the “imperfect icons,” the girls who are by far not the most beautiful girls in the room, but they are confident and think they’re beautiful, so others think they are. I marvel at a six-foot-tall woman in stilettos, a big-bottomed woman in a curve-hugging skirt, a flat-chested woman in a tight, low cut T-shirt.

When a woman embraces her “imperfections,” they can become her greatest strengths, definers of her character and spirit.

When she plays up her weaknesses and draws you to her flaws, she makes them special, attractive, and even enviable.

Confidence has nothing to do with aesthetics and everything to do with attitude. Nothing suits a woman better than this air of self-assurance, and
when she truly owns that, she is unyielding and stunning.

Confidence is the one thing that can instantly turn the volume up on a woman’s beauty.

When it comes to style and confidence, you have to learn to move with it, which can be daunting. We all have our insecurities. But you just know
when you are in the company of a confident woman. Even (or especially) in the face of imperfections, her air is striking. Her beauty is fueled from
something inside her. It’s not that she doesn’t care about her looks; on the contrary, she is so comfortable with who she is that she even embraces
her quirks and flaws.”

“You are the goddess, so start treating yourself accordingly. Get your nails and hair done, take long baths, wear great perfume. Do whatever it is that
makes you feel amazing. You have to pamper yourself, because nobody else is going to do it for you. Start adoring yourself. Love yourself from the
inside out, and slowly but surely you will become comfortable on that pedestal, and you will exude the kind of confidence that others admire. And
what you wear up on that pedestal matters. Sweatsuits just won’t do. I promise you, a great dress or a stunning skirt will make you feel much more
“spotlight worthy,” and others will see you that way, too”.

Confidence, defining yourself and self care: the three basic ingredients that will make fashion an expresion of who you are. I think these are great pillars to live by, and I’m not talking only about fashion.

Next week we’ll talk about the art of editing your wardrobe. Please share your thoughts in the comments!

Patricia Morgado is a Brazilian teacher, jewelry designer and a self acceptance and fashion blogger. She has a degree in Pedagogy and a Master's degree in Human Rights Education. She believes that the key to a happy life is learning to love ourselves. She also believes that fashion is for everyBODY. You can find her jewlery work at Madame Papu's.